Sweet 60

I had originally begun this entry as a story of a bunch of 60ish college friends going to Las Vegas over the NCAA sweet 16 weekend. They would be there to reaffirm their friendships, share memories of friends and families that had recently died and establish in their own minds that they could still bring it when needed.

I believe that story needs to be written and after the event I will re-visit it. But “Sweet 60” was just good to wait on seeing that I am turning 60 years old this Saturday March 20th. It has been 10 years since my Mother coined “50 is Nifty” not knowing she would be included in my film “Dying to Live- the journey into a man’s open heart” I was just out of the hospital 2 weeks after a complication to my heart- valve repairs and my Mom had flown out to Los Angeles to be there for the 50th. She was recovered from a surgery for colon cancer the previous December only 3 ½ months before and did not know anything about my heart condition or hospital stays. In thinking back it was the right choice to let her live without the additional worries of my illness, especially at that stage of her life and with her own medical concerns.

Now I am turning 60. What a decade. At one point I was going to write again about living from 50 to 60 as the “Lost Decade” But in truth it was transformative. My friend Jimmy who has preceded me to the sweetness told me “60 is the new 100”. It was funny the first time I heard it because I had expected to hear a more predictable Baby Boomer approach that would claim 60 to be the new 30. Well 60 is, for lack of a real understanding until I get there…60. and it feels good. I swam 1 ½ miles yesterday and the day before that I took a spinning class with a group of Gen X co-eds and must have dropped 2-3 pounds in sweat. I’m pushing it physically, opening up emotionally, being supportive to my loved ones, working on growing my relationship and finding new wrinkles in my creative process. I have hope and am optimistic about the world I live in.

Around me I’m aware of the challenges of advancing in age. The unexpected deaths and illnesses that are surrounding and invading my web of relations. No one goes untouched. I’m actively work on understanding the core of the models I most admired as a guide to what works as you age and rely more and more on my gut, not over thinking my actions. It’s all in me already. I’ve been thru a lot. I have learned what works for me. Sometimes I write this blog as a pep talk to myself. If I had any advice to myself it would be, Don’t Wait. Do it now. Be Honest with yourself and show your emotions. The people I’ve most admired were doer’s even under the worst circumstances and never once withheld their love.

My friend the writer John Shaner has two sayings that come to mind “Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain” and “What comes from the heart, goes to the heart. Thanks John if you ever read this. I can and have turned those words into action. My Mom who lived to be 89 thru many difficulties also had two sayings I like, “Got to keep movin” and “Life is to give and receive love” The receiving has been more difficult, but rewarding.

So I plan to take it from my youngest nephew. When I ask him how things are going and he feels real good about himself he just responds “Sweet” That’s me. If I were to go tomorrow, I have had a great life. Loved fully, worked with talented artists, had wonderful friends, traveled the globe and genuinely tried to make a difference in the world thru my work and actions. Each day is a challenge and you can never coast, but life is sweet.